This topic has been a hot one lately with the breaking college admissions scandal in the news.  I’ve been a part of several conversations with other moms talking about what these parents did and why so I thought it would be a great opportunity to write about the subject of how far we would really go for our kids.

Let’s face it.  The majority of us don’t even have the money to do what those moms did but the subject of rescuing your child and wanting the very best for them at any cost is something we can all relate to.  I know I am guilty of rescuing my kids on several occasions.  Granted, that may mean taking them their lunch or homework assignment to school when they forget it or doing their laundry for them, but nonetheless, we all have one thing in common as moms; we want the very best for our kids.  The difference is some of us draw the line at delivering the forgotten lunch while others spend millions to get them into college.

The underlying theme of wanting our kids to be successful in this highly competitive world we live in is nothing new.  We start our kids in sports at very early ages, then move them into travel teams or competitive leagues at young ages so that we can set them up to be as successful as possible when they get to high school, college and possibly even beyond for that very small percentage that make it that far.  We do our best to get them with the best coaches who can provide them with the right training to get where they need to be.

We place them in rigorous academic classes and tutoring sessions because we know that if they are going to have any chance of getting into the school they want, their grades have to be virtually flawless.

We push them to be good citizens and volunteer in their communities because it helps make them more well rounded people and aids with the college admissions process as well.

None of these things are wrong as ultimately, we are just looking out for them but it does beg the question, how do you get to the point where you have gone over the edge and are using unscrupulous methods to give them the life you envision for them?  I don’t know Felicity Huffman or Lori Loughlin as anything other than great actresses but at some point, they made decisions that they thought would be best for their children’s future. Does that make them bad people or just loving moms who went too far?  Don’t get me wrong.  I would never support their actions or defend them but as a mom, I do watch the coverage and wonder what prompted their decisions.

I’ve learned a lot of lessons as a parent over the years and I can honestly say, I want my kids to live up to the full potential that I know they are both capable of but I also know I can’t do it for them.  I can push, help, nag and support them every step of the way but in the end, it is on them.  My hope is that each of them works hard, finds their true passion in life and gives themselves the opportunity to pursue anything they want.  If I am guilty of doing too much of their laundry or making their lunches for them, I’ll take it.  In the end, if I have raised healthy, independent, strong, motivated children, than I have done my job.  If not, I have done my best and I will love them no matter where life takes them because that’s what we do.  There is no greater job than being a mom and while it can be the hardest thing we ever do in life, the sacrifices are worth every single second.